By Res Ipsa Bowlquitor

Per Restatement of Torts 2Peep Section 507, a Peepsessor of a wild animal is subject to another Peepson for harm done by the animal to the other Peepson, even if the Peepsessor has exercised the utmost care to confine the animal or otherwise prevent it from doing harm. Unfortunately, Mr. Green didn’t consider this doctrine before letting his pet, the rare and exotic cattus magnus clunes (colloquially: huge a– cat) into the front yard at the same time that Mr. Yellow was out for a stroll. After Mr. Green’s defense—that Mr. Yellow’s preference for tuna-based aftershave provoked the attack—failed miserably, the court awarded damages to Mr. Yellow, who appreciates the dough, but would rather have both ears and not suffer traumatic flashbacks during Meow Mix commercials.

Note: No cats were harmed during the making of this diorama. Which is more than we can say for the Peeps.